life in the darkness

Good evening. I haven’t posted on here for a while. A bit of a health update first. I have been for a DXA bone density scan. The scan showed that my spine density has decreased slightly compared with the last scan in 2018, while my hips have increased, so slightly improved. I won’t know the full results report until next week though. I have also had some fillings replaced on my teeth and also have wisdom tooth coming through. Consequently, my teeth are a little tender at the back where my tooth is cutting through.

Now for the general update. I have been reading all the comments on here, which mostly are pretty scathing, nasty and down right rude! I am not a horrible person. I made mistakes in the past, which we all do. The sad thing is though, that people just cannot let go. You ask them to stop posting on things, stop contacting you. Yet, they still carry on, whilst playing the card that they themselves, are being stalked and harassed by me. I don’t understand them sometimes. Whoever these people are, I feel sad for you, that you carry such bitterness and hold so many grudges. I hope one day, you find peace in yourselves.

on a more positive note, me and my friend Lynn, listened to an audio described film which always comes on around Christmas. Good Night Mr Tom, based on a novel. I love the heart warming story. About a boy called William, who is evacuated to the country during World war 2. He is with a very bitter man Tom Oakley. Well, we all see him as bitter at first, but as the film goes on, he softens, and becomes the boy’s adopted father. I won’t tell you much here, in case you decide to read the book, or watch the film. I warn you though, you may cry! I do, all the time! On another note, My friend Rachel, who has been there for me throughout Hereford days as well as rescuing me with her mother Getting me out of a traumatic situation in 2018, has recorded another accompaniment for me to a song, which I can now start learning. She is a very good pianist and I encourage you all to look her up. http://www.rachelstarritt.com

Thank you so much Rachel. You are a lovely person. Thank you to all who are still by my side through my good days and the bad mental health days. Thank you to the doctors and practice nurses who are still helping me with my health conditions. To the physiotherapist helping me with the exercises for my knees. Especially to my Cardiologist, dr H, for helping me with the pots treatment locally. As well as his wonderful clarinet playing! He is a very gifted person, with a posh voice. TO MY grandmother, thank you so much, even when you’re frustrated with me, for still being there for me. To everyone at the headway group. Thank you. Everyone still by my side, even if we don’t speak often, I have not forgotten you. I will never ever forget you. You know where I am if you want to speak.